Monday, 22 July 2013

Sad - Bad Moods Can Be Good For You

OK. So.....I know that part of my job is to help my clients choose their words and their feelings and to learn to embrace what is positive.  In fact that is a huge part of creating new habits that serve you well. But what about the days when you really are feeling like a big sack of poo. What is one meant to do with those days???


Well my friend. Those days are for real too. They are just as real as the good ones. I know that that is not what many of my clients expect to hear form me. It seems that they fully expect me to say that "down days and sad feelings are not OK, and that we should wrap them up in rainbows and let them melt away within the power of Love". Or something as equally weird and crazy as that. But that really isn't true, and I will never teach the power of positive anything without explaining the authenticity of both sides and everything that there is in between.

So you have a few bad days. Or maybe you are having more than a few. No need to engage the panic button just yet. Don't worry. These days and emotions that seem so prevalent now don't have to remain in a leading role in your future. And they aren't anything to be afraid of. They, in fact, hold a lot of wisdom. 

Wait a min. What????  How can that be??? What kind of wisdom could there possibly be in my sad mood???  

Lots. You just have to know that it is there to be seen.  

You see my friend your emotions are messages. What your sad really is, is the greater part of you - the part of you that is connected to God, The Universe, Source - telling you that on this subject, the direction of your thoughts are facing you is not the direction of your greatest well being. 

Its kind of like playing that "HOT & COLD" game you played as a kid.  The goal is to find your life purpose and the great feelings that come along with it. Your emotions is your all knowing buddy telling you how close you are to the good feeling spot. Sad is like them telling you that you are freezing cold. Brrr. As you move up the emotional scale you are getting warmmm-er, warmmm-er, warmmm-er..... 

So you are facing in the direction you are now and feeling crummy (your buddy is telling you that you are cold).  That's OK. Decide that this direction of thought and possible outcome is no longer comfortable. Decide to try another direction and see if your buddy tells you that you are warmmm-er. Pay attention to your emotions. 

Good News! You know what is going on inside your head and you know if you like how that feels. You know if this is the direction you want or not. If you DO like what you have go going on, then great. Stay put. But if you think that there might be something better out there, then go down the list of possibilities and start trying a few of them on for good feeling size.  You can already cross at least this one off of your list of maybes. One set of thoughts that you know isn't serving you. (I do so love crossing things off of any list) And there it is!! There is the wisdom

Knowing that one of the many possible directions is not what you want and crossing it off of your list of possible directions has just shortened the list.  You are getting closer to knowing what it is that you DO want and what DOES serve you. Ah, closer. You are on your way! Congratulations!

Now that you have got your mojo flowing, keep going. Try another approach to this same topic. Are you getting warmm-er... warmm-er... warmm-er???  Either you can now cross another set of possibles off of your list, or maybe you have found the exact right one. 

It took me years of serious and constant depression and then a lot of years of ups and downs, that were really mid-levels and downs more than they were ups and downs, to figure out that out.  I spent years dwelling on my sad and expecting it to be a huge part of my future.  It took some real effort on my part to first want to find a way out and then to actually be open to and seek that way out. A bad mood or a sad day used to be a very scary place but now its a knowing that I have some more growing to do. Or that I am not quite ready to deal with a subject.  Or that this just simply isn't the road I want and I can cross this thought off of my list of possibilities. "Been there - done that - no thank you" And I find myself one step closer to finding the road that I do want to travel.




For the record - I am loving the road I find myself on now. 

What about you? Is this idea new to you? What do you think? Can you think of how you might remind yourself to look for the wisdom next time you are feeling a lower level emotion?  Or have you used your sad as a learning tool before? If you have I would love to hear about how it. Help inspire another by leaving your story here in the comments section or share with us on my Facebook page.